Day 8 - Complaint day...I'm allowed, right?

Little Rock:

Woke up with itchy bumps on my thighs and arms. I wanted to cry, and I still have one more night in this dunghole that won't refund my money. Just think of India, I told myself. At least there's no resident rat in the bathroom, and I'm awfully grateful I brought flip flops. I dabbed acetone on every nook and crook.

Before heading out to explore the city, I stopped by the motel office and complained again and showed them my arm bumpies. I told the front desk manager that serious health violations had been breached and I wouldn't have skin if I stayed another night. The manager capitulated and moved me to a room with wood floors. Springs are popping out of the bed, but the room is clean. Later I told my brother about my ailments, and he said I can't visit him in Boston until I go to a laundromat and wash every last article of clothing.

The city was a ghost town this Saturday. I went to Little Rock Central High School, site of the desegregation showdown, and nobody was there to bother me. I thought of the Little Rock Nine walking the gauntlet, and the 'throat hurt' came over me. Went to the capitol and walked slowly up the steps of the capitol building afraid that if I went any slower, my sweat glands would burst and splash the steps like the senator from X-Men. James, my GPS, was annoying me so I switched him off and cruised the city from boulevard to boulevard. I stumbled upon the Governor's Mansion and explored an ancient cemetery...an agreeable place with a calming vibe.

At this point I was really shaking - I mean New Mexico State Police no-no shaking. I spotted Kanpai, a Japanese restaurant. I sat down, excited about eating rice, when I noticed other customers glancing at me with sadness in their eyes, like they wanted me to join their table. Geez, I have no problem eating alone. The server interrupted my thoughts as he handed over my bento box. He let me know that he's Chinese Indonesian. "They can't tell the difference." The rice was a bit hard and the food was no Japanese grub, but it was manna.

My skin bumps were itching hard. On the way back to the motel, I saw a girl with a nice smile dangling a sign: Free Car Wash!!! My car was filthy and the tires were white from the other day's off-roading. Her dad, brother, and sister were waiting for me with their trash can barbecue hissing from rib fat. No, I didn't try the baby backs. Free, by the way, was ten dollars in the end.

So tomorrow before I head out to Tennessee, I'm taking my brother Ray's advice and going diamond mining at Crater of Diamonds State Park in Mufreesboro, AR. Hope I find me some diamonds. Our agreement...Ray gets to keep my loot since it was his idea.

Day 7 - Clinton overkill...thank goodness for okra

Arkansas:

I had a great sleep in Oklahoma last night despite the Celtics loss. When I turned off the lights, little stars glowed from the ceiling just like in my brother Joe's old bedroom. Good omen. I was on my way to Fayetteville and Little Rock to do the Clinton thing. First stop was the Clinton's 'wedding home' in Fayetteville. The curator was a terrific woman whose name I've already forgotten. Some memory since we talked for over an hour. The little museum was sparse...just pictures and a video room where I watched old campaign commercials from the 1970s. It was so interesting that I was forced to use the Clinton bathroom and inflict some damage.

The woman - let's call her Charisma since she was so charismatic - gave me a passport so I can go to every nationally registered Clinton building/home/toilet. Get this...they call the pilgrimage "Billgrimage"! MF! Here are some of the places:

*Birthplace Museum (Hope AR)
*The Boyhood Home (Hot Springs, AR)
*First Home of Bill & Hillary (Fayetteville)
*The Clintons' First Capital City (Little Rock)
*Home of Clinton's Mustang Convertible (Morrilton)
*Presidential Cabin (Ponca)

The list goes on. I arrived in Little Rock and went to the Museum Store where I didn't even browse. I just pressed my pennies. The neat thing about the town is, the city ferries people from the hip River Market District to the Presidential Library. At this point, however, I was Clintoned out.

The gorgeous rust colored bridge overhanging the Arkansas River that stood within feet from the Presidential Library and the great modern building designed by James Polshek absorbed my attention despite the heat and the fact that I was wearing black. After a time I sighed and successfully passed through an x-ray security checkpoint to get inside. I cracked a huge smile knowing I had innocently sneaked inside the heavily guarded place with mace in my pocket. When asked to join the group by the guide, I declined said I had ADHD. I toured quickly, sick of the president I admired. I was searching for Monica Lewinsky's dress for I heard a rumor that the Library had it. But wouldn't you know it, the blue dress wasn't there. Sheesh.

Bummed, I lit out of there quick. Since I'd read that Arkansas had some of the best barbecue in the country I placed an order. I don't know if it's because I'm more-or-less a vegetarian or not, but the meat tasted piggish. Well, at least I tried it. BaddicusFinch would've loved the fried okra.

I booked a room at Motel 6 thinking it was fine...until I saw six dead little cockroaches (?) and a giant dead spider in the toilet! The management wouldn't give me my money back. Said they'll sweep them away tomorrow. Eeee. It's the Clinton Effect.

So today was a top day with very kind folks at each turn. A man offered to take my picture in the replica of the Oval Office, but I said I was a photophobe and that I was lame. He said kindly, "It's not lame. My pastor had the same fear but from looking at mirrors."

Tomorrow I'm going to the historic Little Rock High School. I can't wait. Hello Penny and Toby.