Wednesday, May 5, 2010

wanna be the color of puffy white clouds

A friend of an acquaintance of mine took me aside and said, "You have pretty light skin, but you can have whiter skin like I do." How fckng weird was that? This little Asian vampire starts talking to me about this chemo therapy that lightens up the skin in no time via drip or injection. Apparently shit like this is quite popular in Asian countries such as Singapore, Malaysia, Philippines, etc. Even the Middle East is getting in on it.

I looked it up when I got home of course so I could write about the Michael Jacksonified method used by many of my people. The key ingredient in skin whitening drips is glutathione, a strong antioxidant for treating cancer and AIDS patients. Another ingredient is tranexamic acid which could lead to kidney/liver failure. Ah, the price of beauty. Apparently a nurse or an "almost" nurse can administer the pretty poison no questions asked. Some even buy an entire kit overseas so they can inject their bodies until they're the color of maggots.

There you go. If this fad catches on, the entire country could be white. Racism will cease and world peace will prevail. Hallelujia!


Absent Referent said...

Late one night in Shanghai, I watched an infomercial for skin lightening lotion and height "enhancers" (basically platform casual shoes - imagine a sneaker with heels). Halfway around the world from my home, my people all around me and this comes on...

BaddicusFinch said...

infomercial says, if we're all white then there wouldn't be ku klux klan.